ShinSungmi done!
I need an honest review of the first 4 reviews I can write SWAP
Acutelittletrap Thanks for the idea. The only question is how to implement this. If it’s not difficult, could you give an example of how to do this?
At the expense of numbers, this is a cipher ... but how can I make the tode reader light up with this cipher and want to know what is hidden behind it, I don’t know? Maybe then, in general, remove the numbers from the text and just send Dara to the archive? Without any secrecy, secret societies, simple, clear.
Go straight to the search for treasures rather than desk work in the archives?
If it’s not difficult for you, could you give advice on how to do this?
Thanks in advance.
- Edited
Acutelittletrap Thank you for the interesting thought. as you said, I re-read the chapter, and clearly saw all those mistakes that you told me. I rewrote it, it has changed almost 90 percent! But this is only the raw materials and the first grinding. It seems to me that the chapter turned out to be more understandable. But still it left the numbers, though only one group.
Gourmet_DAO Thanks! You can post it here.
0 - chapter
I will write my thoughts in each chapter I read, and after that I will summarize the general result. So I have to split my review into several parts. My English is not so good, so there may be misunderstandings in understanding, if you ask anything, I will explain what I meant.
Synopsis - for some reason, Mark Twain’s story “The Prince and the Pauper” reminded me immediately. But the story sounds very exciting interest in the novel!
Oh, reading chapter 0, I caught myself thinking that I had already met such a hero somewhere, I read at least two short stories with this type, and he was also Japanese. I hope that your romance is not fan fiction and not cliché! Since it would be very disappointing. I do not want this! Hope this is not the case!
Here, the choice of Japanese names is of interest, they are all very loud, famous, behind them already have their own stories from the real earthly world. Does this have anything to do with the choice of names? or did the author simply select them as the Japanese names that are heard?
What is alarming is that there are too many heroes. I have more of them, but I'm slowly starting to get confused in them. Having two or three heroes is enough. But maybe this is just an author’s idea? It is not up to me for the reader to decide.
It is good that there is an additional 0 chapter, it gives the reader introductory information about the character of the heroes, the worlds in which they live. This is great, this is a big plus!
1st chp
Is curious eye color something meaning? Some characterization of the heroine? The described interior of the room, then he will still appear in the novel or not?
But the first chapter I liked the plasticity of the dialogues, they are natural IMHO.
But with the magic circles breaks, but I'm glad that I was mistaken, the novel is not cliché, this is an original work.
And the plot is famously twisted !!!
The transfer of Japanese, Chinese, American, probably everyone would say that? It reminds a plot about the Normal Japanese Schoolboy. But manga and reality are two different things. What goes cliché again? I hope not.
It's just that the immunity of a modern person is worse than that of those who lived a couple of centuries ago. From viruses (like Hebert Wales's about Martians) the main character could make ends very quickly, but I don’t know if the magic of healing would help him?
Oh phone, had the phone functions from the short story "I have an estate in the apocalyptic world"? It seems a lot of borrowing from other short stories.
Gourmet_DAO A great work, I can assure 
.
Gourmet_DAO A great work, I can assure .
@Gourmet_DAO @Veronica8 is now a loose cultivator. But she has a true heart of Dao. She cares about the immortals here. That's why I'm sending her a plate of lunargrubs. Lunar magical bugs coated in lunar honey. I hope you look favourably at this delicacy @Veronica8 .
Primate Thank you so much, Bro Tao! Yes, I really appreciate the help, goodwill, advice!
Many thanks to these savvy Taoists who follow the path of enlightenment!
As I read, correct, rewrite, and rewrite chapters. I hope I can finish this process and enjoy reading the novel of respected Bro!
Respect!
Nightmare_Taichou For the remaining chapters, I will write my review tomorrow! I hope!
Gourmet_DAO You are flattering this Daoist heart 
- Edited
I noticed the changes. <3 But you went too far =[. I am not a pro, but I'll provide a sample of my writing and break it down for you.
Kaylah tied up her long ruby hair and grabbed an arrow from her dark-green quiver. Her target a hollow doll at the other end of the store which donned her old outfit. A black tag top, a leather belt, and worn out camouflage gear.
She released an arrow that soared past the weapons section of the store and though the head of a doll of an old worn down doll. What a waste. Kaylah grinned after striking her distant target and pounded her chest. She then turned around and faced me while yelling, “Father!” Kaylah held another arrow and pulled back on her bowstring. My heart skipped a beat as her eyes bulged. Has she gone crazy!? I leaped toward my left behind an old weapon display.
An arrow flew out of her bow and through the air. I followed the arrow as something crashed into the ground behind me. Half of the arrow found itself in the skull of a massive white and grey wolf. The wolf’s blood and brain matter flowed from its skull and stained the abandoned store’s tile ground.
In terms of what we were talking about, I'll break down each paragraph.
- Establishing the location. (A store)a fraction of her skill set and appearance. Hints toward the environment (Dark Green, Black.) Also giving information about the time, (Tank top, Store, leather belt.) Another hint would be the reaction to her shooting an arrow, but this is not in this paragraph.
A mistake is that a reader might view this as 3rd person, I need to fix that in future edits.
- It shows that Kaylah is a skilled archer. It also establishes the Pov, (Kaylah's father.) Though this part could be done better. We learned more about Kaylah indirectly, for example, she is not the type to panic as she quickly took action. An important note is that we have events whereas your current revision establishes lore, but we need more focus on the story and less of the grand setting I recommend zooming in more.
Remember while books like TLOR are wonderful many say it won't be published currently.
- Consider this an outcome of sorts, but clearly, this situation needs to be addressed, why is the wolf here? And, how is the father going to react? Here establishes a power structure of sorts some tension as the father nearly died, but at this point, the reader does not care too much about him which is why its Some tension.
If you look deeper you will find hints of the situation and the world in each of the above, what I wrote is only a starting point, something I personally rate a 6/10 on a good day. But, we all gotta improve and the road to greatness is a long one.
Nightmare_Taichou 2-d chapter
Cliché, apparently, it cannot be avoided in novels with displacement and parallel reality. And in the Japanese runaw, they generally said that in the world there are three identical people, tees? To write in this genre, science fiction is difficult, since almost everything is already painted, by eminent and not very writers. coming up with a new story for the author is very difficult. Unless only to change a little bit the world and try to move away from the usual cliché.
Nightmare_Taichou 2-d chapter
Cliché, apparently, it cannot be avoided in novels with displacement and parallel reality. And in the Japanese runaw, they generally said that in the world there are three identical people, tees? To write in this genre, science fiction is difficult, since almost everything is already painted, by eminent and not very writers. coming up with a new story for the author is very difficult. Unless only to change a little bit the world and try to move away from the usual cliché.
3-d
And the world is not feudal Nihon, but a completely different ??? Wow!
Oooooooooooooo! Republics, democracies? !! And the feudal system, or is it a monarchy ??? Well, if in the ordinary world they can all get along, then it is likely in a fantasy it can be. Although of course, this explicit is not typical, but we catch the usual cliché. So the author, well done, uses innovative techniques!
4-rd
A friend of the main character was a fan of manga, anime, that is, a geek? And here, apparently, there is a description of the new world, a little boring, but you need to put up with it. To better understand where the hero lives. Oh, there is Naurto, the tank booms were in Kyoto for only 900 yen .. but I wonder if they will visit the Manga Museum in Kyoto? This is just offtopic.
There is humor, a friendship bracelet! It's ridiculous! I even laughed!
Oh snap can I get a forum review too ursus?
The Stolen Princess and Blind Prince
Genre - Historical Romance, Action, Comedy. (I'll have to change the tags to reflect this lmao)
Synopsis - AhnAhn was royal property. A prize won when her country’s war against the emperor failed. Her mother and older brother were spared on one condition: if AhnAhn married the emperor's blind son Wulin.
Wulin was a curious young man, the product of the emperor and a concubine. He was pushed aside, forgotten and spurred by many within the palace. But being the emperor's son, he was well trained in martial arts, his blindness amplifying his senses. He found his fun blending amongst the common folk. Every night dressing up as a poor man, a common man, a noodle seller and the like.
Currently, he had the most fun disguising himself as a thief, he and his gang robbing carriages by candlelight.
Tonight, was the night AhnAhn would be delivered to the royal palace, and tonight AhnAhn's carriage was in his sights...
Tell me what you think. I'll also post a review of your chapters here, because I don't think four chapters is enough to leave a review.
- Edited
I have not stopped to give a review. There were 17 chapters, maybe there are updates. I read 2-3 chapters a day and write my opinion on what I felt when I read it.
Yes, I would be happy if you left your eyes on my novel. If you leave a link to your work, I will also write my vision. But I do not comment on the work related to LGBT topics, if anything, I do not read them.
Judging by the synonym, it reminded me of several classic European works and one Persian.
European are the knightly novels of Paul Feval in particular, as well as the novels "Black Tulip", "Zorro", "Captain Fracas" Theophile Gautier. And what the prince did, dressing up in the clothes of commoners, did the "Harun al-Rashid" caliph of the Arab Caliphate and Nakhrushvan the Great Emperor of Persia.
In the 21st century, it was easy to write 100 percent of the original work, not in favor, the authors can only change the usual scripts of the cliché, and try to write something of their own, new.
So if you are satisfied with my honest opinion about your work from a subjective point of view, I am not opposed to our review exchange, in compliance with network ethics.
mine - https://www.webnovel.com/book/15195393805364505/The-Adventures-of-Treasure-Hunters
P.S.
I saw a link, I hope to read the songwriter 2 chapters, and the rest are already in the process of interest or within the next week.
Judging by the picture, this is Korea! I like historical Korean dramas like Tangim - The Pearl of the Palace. I read about the history of Korea and the three states of Korea, Silla, Pecce. Also in our country there is a Korean diaspora, I like to eat "champagne" but the diaspora came from the Far East, it was resettled during the second empire in our 40th year. So the Koreans have dishes that were popular at the end of 19 - beginning of the 20th centuries. They differ from the southerners.
But we have just a bakery in the city, it is kept by culinary specialists from South Korea from Seoul, they are well prepared, you can try baking from Seoul. This is offtopic.
- Edited
To: Lilliny
Honest review 1st chapter:
An intriguing story from the very beginning, the suppression of a weak country, by an empire. All the colonies were waiting for such a fate. An interesting start.
But this is not a docking, if everyone had taken it away, then the castle would have been taken away. these are the rules of the game, colonization. nationalization. The losing side would be exiled, they would put spies on them. So that they do not start anything silly like a coup d'etat. Pressure groups would come to them every day and bring them to nervous exhaustion. So that they have poor health, and they thought about treatment and not about revenge.
They would be provided with an external surveillance service, all their movements, conversations would be monitored day and night. So it works in the real world. And for you this is not fully reflected. In this case, the dog would be killed first in order to torture more of the rogue family.
Gas? Is chlorine or mustard? A trip to the first world war? Interesting however the world, on the one hand palaces on the other gas from the third cart. The world is drawn by some kind of surreal. Dissonance from feudalism, the Middle Ages and the industrial era of capitalism.
Second chapter
What can I say, while I was thinking, to give my comment I have already read the chapter. It was fascinating. The poor dog, the head of the bandits, the blind man, and his gang ... a little without weight ... well, these are small particulars. The rich have their own quirks.