No idea if this is actually allowed or not, but we all want out stories to succeed, right? And what is the most important part of the story?

The bit of the book that's not even part of the story to begin with. Without a decent synopsis no one will want to read your works, right? So why not help each other out, one writer to the next, and help give your writing brother or sister a helping hand?

No links allowed so it doesn't come off as "self-promotion", just copy and paste your synopsis.

Rank the one above on a 1 to 10 ratio - 1 being the worst you've ever seen; 10 being a perfect synopsis.

I'll go ahead and give mine to start us off:

When a sickness of unknown origin destroys their home, Floris Fetcher and Alvis Era are forced to leave their old lives behind them and begin anew. Having only ever stayed in the area surrounding their isolated village in Fiorra's South Swamp, the two young boys experience a culture shock they never could have expected.

The boys embark on a journey to find an organization called the "Mages' Guild" to hone their skills and begin a new life. Along the way, they encounter new friends, new enemies, new places, and new challenges that will not only test their personal strengths but also the strength of their friendship.

"Mages of the North" is a fantasy series that was originally inspired by "Naruto" and "The Elder Scrolls 4: Oblivion". It focuses heavily on character development, world-building, and exploration, while also having a bit of action and comedy in it.

    Dalton_Reutlinger

    Sometimes the 1-10 rating system throws me off. It can be hard to differentiate between, let’s say, a 6 and a 7. I’ll give yours a 7 because it’s well-written and does it’s job on telling us generally what the story is about.

    I have some small tips off the top of my head, assuming you are open to them:

    Culture shock sounds interesting, but “they they never expected” is almost implicit from the term “culture shock.” I would prefer if you changed that to something more telling of what causes the culture shock. Perhaps something like, “... a culture shock when they are thrown into the life of an adventurer.” It can be anything, but I think that you can use that space for something other than telling us they didn’t expect the culture shock.

    If you make a list and the word “new” is used on every item, then you can pull it out front. New will be implied to be in front of everything without being repetitive.

    I think “Mages Guild” is a common enough phrase that you can delete “an organization called”. People will know that it is an organization based off the name. It’s actually a guild, which is a synonym for organization (I think). That phrase is just repetitive, but this is a minor issue.

        shadowdrake27 Thanks for the feedback! Is this any better?

        When a sickness of unknown origin destroys their home, Floris Fetcher and Alvis Era are forced to leave their old lives behind them and begin anew. Having only ever stayed in the area surrounding their isolated village in Fiorra's South Swamp, the two young boys experience a culture shock they never could have expected by being thrust into an 18th-century world and seeing things they never thought imaginable.

        The boys embark on a journey to find the Mages' Guild to hone their skills and begin a new life. Along the way, they encounter new friends, enemies, places, and challenges that will not only test their personal strengths but also the strength of their friendship.

        "Mages of the North" is a fantasy series that was originally inspired by "Naruto and "The Elder Scrolls 4: Oblivion". It focuses heavily on character development, world-building, and exploration, while also having a bit of action and comedy in it.

            Dalton_Reutlinger

            I personally like it better, yes. I still think your first paragraph doesn’t need all of the “they never expected” and “see things they never imagined”.

            You could say, “experience a culture shock when they are thrust into an 18th century world where magical spells and creatures run amok.” Those are my words, so don’t feel the need to use them, but that’s more of what I would go for.

            Again, sort of a small thing. Your synopsis is mostly good.

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