Alright, first things first, I choose to ignore your request because you didn't use the method I described in the first post.
Second, it seems someone already picked your request. Did you accept it?
Detailed Review Request Thread!!
waurpel I'll help you out with the synopsis. Here's an idea:
In a world where rank, blood ties, and religion are intertwined, Silika Everest lived an idyllic life as the third child of the Marquess of Oblon, spending her carefree life playing with her siblings and friends to her hearts' content.
Until one fateful day, when she fell off a tree and injured herself. When she woke up from the injury, everything seemed...wrong and confusing. She couldn't hear a thing. Now, her family despises her, and she doesn't know why. Silika's entire world had been flipped on its head.
That day her quiet life began—an unforgiving life where all odds were stacked against her.
Basically, I added the part "spending her carefree life playing with her siblings and friends to her hearts' content." to give more context about Silika's daily life. I also described the accident without going into too much detail (hopefully). Other than that, I also fixed some grammar. I hope my idea can help you formulate your synopsis.
Hello,
Please check my story out and give an honest review. I'm open to anything and would appreciate comments on where I can improve.
Title : I HAVE A FIANCEE ?!
Genre : Royal romance, Realistic
Synopsis :
"You're early. Why the bad mood ? Getting married so soon your highness ?"
"Shut up, Jaden. This is no joke. It's the 21st century for god's sake and I'm still 22 which means I've got a million things to do and marriage is not one of them. Damn it! I don't know what Father is thinking" I was annoyed.
"Well, it was a surprise when he actually listened to you and let you come to college when what you actually should've done is participate in all those boring political discussions, give a comment here and there and serve the country. You are our beloved, handsome, genius one and only prince after all" Jaden cracked up laughing. Making fun of me seemed have become an annoying hobby of his, besides making sarcastic comments on almost everything. I sighed.
"Since you're saying so, why don't you shut up & let me think. That's an order" I snapped, making him laugh even more.
"Trust me Charlie, you're hilarious. What can you say, life's full of surprises.
Life certainly is full of surprises ...
Link : https://www.webnovel.com/book/i-have-a-fiancee-!_19977193006327505
Thank you !
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Hello,
Please check my story out and give an honest review. I'm open to anything and would appreciate comments on where I can improve.
Title: Find me in your memory
Genre: Contemporary, Fantasy romance
Synopsis:
Meet Elena Carlo
The sister of the cold-blooded king of the international underworld. Not only did she come from one of the most powerful criminal family she was also known as a genius and prodigy amongst her peers. She had everything with her luxury, money, beauty, and most importantly her brother who raised her making everyone envious. He was her everything just like she was his until one cold night where she was assassinated. Just when she thought everything has come to an end. She woke up as Xin Xiulin a 17-year-old orphan who has lost everything. Was a new beginning a curse or a blessing?
Meet Jun Zixuan
The president of a multibillionaire company.The king of the country's business world who only a very few can dare to offend. Having his heart broken already he believed he can never love again until he starts to notice changes in the silent orphan in his house. Her similarities to a certain someone made it easier for her to worm her way into his heart. While all she knew was familial love can he teach her something new? While she would like to go back to her brother can he stop her?
But what if her shadow of the past never left her? Would it come back to haunt her? Will she embrace that fire or burn in it?
But the life of Xin Xiulin wasn't as easy as it looked. While past acquaintances kept coming can she know who is a friend and who is a foe?
If you want to know the answer come join her and him in this wonderful journey of love, hatred, and longing.
Link:https://www.webnovel.com/book/find-me-in-your-memory_20311302605090405###
Thank you
Ohh that does sound good! I tried to give it a twist, how does this sound:
In a world where rank, blood-ties and religion are intertwined; Silika Everest lived an idyllic life as the third child of the Marquess of Oblon, spending her time causing trouble for the estate servants and playing with her siblings to her heart's content under the doting
Until a faithful day when a game of hide and seek turned into tragedy. When she woke up, her life had turned on its head, everything she had and the people she loved slipping away from her.
That day her quiet life began— an unforgiving life where all odds are stacked against her.
How's that?
Yoan_Roturier
Thanks a lot.
Epyonnn HA! GOOD SPOT. I was gonna write something else but forgot. I'll just remove it. and compress the second paragraph:
In a world where rank, blood-ties and religion are intertwined; Silika Everest lived an idyllic life as the third child of the Marquess of Oblon, spending her time causing trouble for the estate servants and playing with her siblings to her heart's content.
Until a faithful day when a game of hide and seek turned into tragedy. When she woke up, her life had turned on its head, everything she had now slipping away from her.
That day her quiet life began— an unforgiving life where all odds are stacked against her.
Hello, my favorite thread! I have republished my novel and rebranded it (as well as rewriting) after taking in the honest advice fully. I would appreciate an honest review of where it is now (only has 5 chapters thus far), and I will give an equally honest, detailed review in return. (or 3 days' worth of powerstones if you already have your intake of honest reviews :P)
Soulmate Game : Her Lethal Love
Link: https://www.webnovel.com/book/soulmate-game-her-lethal-love_20340245006547205
Synopsis:
Everyone has a destined soulmate, and in the World of Syre, a game is played amongst four empires to find your fated half.
Occurring every 30 years, chosen nobles and royalty are gifted with the memory of their past life and an invitation to the game by the Mercy of God. The rules are simple: find your soulmate at all costs.
If you lose, you and your family are cursed to die within 12 months. If you win, you are gifted with the highest social class's prosperity and wealth for the rest of your life.
Mira was a spy who reincarnated into an orphan peasant. When she receives half of her memories with an invitation to the True Half game, her first motivation is to find and save her brother.
But why are these three handsome men always in her way? The playful Duke heir, the cold-hearted Crown Prince, and the mysterious noble Xith keep messing up her plans! Mira wants nothing to do with them—until it’s revealed that one of them is her real True Half.
Will she find her brother?
Will she find her soulmate?
Will she uncover the secrets of this evil game?
Let’s find out.
I'm a new strand in this thread who would love an honest review.
Title: Devil Child
Genre: Fantasy, Action, Adventure
Autistic and alone, Noe begins a new life at a mysterious school. Trapped in a sea of faceless people, prejudice, and pain, he has no choice but to learn to coincide with evil. In the small town of Westville, at a school erected within the heart of chaos, the incredible power that Noe possesses is awakened.
https://www.webnovel.com/book/devil-child_19990523105255605
Yoan_Roturier Hey! I know this is a thread for review swipes, but I would like to be your editor.
DM me if you are interested. Prikkrang#6083 is my discord id.
Yoan_Roturier Hey! I know this is a thread for review swipes, but I would like to be your editor.
DM me if you are interested. Prikkrang#6083 is my discord id.
Yoan_Roturier
Hey! I know this is a thread for review swipes, but I would like to be your editor.
DM me if you are interested. Prikkrang#6083 is my discord id.
- Edited
@MimiTea Alright. I've read all the chapters so far. It's a good start, and I see literally nothing wrong, except for one nitpick: try not to repeat nouns and adjectives within the same two paragraphs. As a rudimentary example, someone might say, "Open this door!" Then, the first line in the next paragraph may say, "The child opened the door." It doesn't affect the reading too much, but placing two instances word "door" in close proximity leads to some choppiness. Sometimes, the sentence can fall apart if you start substituting words, so just keep in mind sentence variety (which you already do well, for the most part).
Since it's only the beginning of the story, I really have nothing else to say other than to keep up the good work. Let me know when you have more chapters, and I'll give them a critique as well.
- Edited
I am back... here... with some suggestions... again.
I can see that some people really spend their time trying to help... @Epyonnn great work!
@Yoan_Roturier too.
sooo... at least we could give him/her a few power stones ;)
I am not going to corrupt anyone, but I think that's a nice way for telling 'thank you for your precious time'
Hi! I don't have the means nor the time to engage in a partnership with an editor at the moment, but I'll remember your offer— if need be—when I do have them. Plus, I don't really know you for now.
Thank you for taking an interest in my work (assuming you read it).
