The cold and abusive ML trope gives female readers a sense of entitlement and fake security, so its quite popular.
These days, abuse is so common that some women can't fight back. So, they wanted a kind of release. They wanted to feel confident. Safe and secure. Appreciated.
Imagine it, someone who's head over heels for you, wishing to give you everything, and wanting you for himself.
Its cringe, but some people can't help finding it attractive.
I like it a bit if the person they love doesn't take advantage of them, where they'll feel overwhelmed and useless instead, so they're gonna try to be strong and useful, but....
If it was abuse or too much simping, like, no self-love at all, I'll knock on the author's door at 3AM with a knife.