MiaoMiao11
It is a draft, lol the last thing I care about is grammar, but it is always nice.
I wanted your thoughts on presentation and stuff of that nature.
Another one of our female authors thinks I'm sexist, maybe I crossed some line, in the draft?
maybe the mc comes off as hollow etc, I think for the most part based on the few comments it was an improvement, but more input is always, nice.