Noah_Heridia Would you be able to do a detailed review for mine as well? If you have the time of course. I just posted the first chapter and would really benefit from some feedback!
Thanks( ยดโˆ€๏ฝ€)
http://wbnv.in/a/3ahkRbs
Also, I can send a Google doc if that's more helpful.

      Perfect_praize
      Done.
      Btw I'd recommend looking at some of your descriptions, because while they're done well, they make your writing feel a little stiff. You don't need to lessen them, more change the sentencing of how you describe something.

      Also maybe break up some of your paragraphs to make them easier to read (and look less chunky). And be a little careful with grammar. You had have quite a few errors. (And while I get that English may not be your first language, you could use something like Grammarly to catch a lot of those errors)

        ATOMIC_MOON https://www.webnovel.com/book/rain-rain-go-away-come-again-another-day_26557020606729705
        Please have a go at reading this, i promise you, that you would enjoy every single moment, and suck in the richness of this story that reading it a second time wouldn't faze you but immerse you deeper into the world of Kian, and his story

        Everybody hates the rain right?
        The rain is quite the oxymoron,
        lest they are morns for being an irony
        When the sun shines it rains
        So we sing rain rain go away,
        come again another day.
        what day exactly?
        a sad day?
        a happy day?
        a cloudy day
        everyone hates the rain right?
        Why?

        "I Love it"

        Kian, A boy who feels found when under the rain,
        "Kian, what makes you happy?"
        "..."
        "Kian?"
        Silently in the distance a group of children in yellow rain coats sing "Rain Rain Go Away Come Again Another Day"

        This is the romantic and deeply moving story of a boy named Kian, who, rejected by his lover, feels despair and pain. He finds peace under the mysterious raindrops. In a world where he feels like an outsider, Kian strives to find true love and compassion while discovering himself and unravelling the mysteries of his own heart.

        Unbeknownst to Kian, his world evolves gradually.

        "When rainfall comes, the world grows magical," murmured an old woman from a distance, her voice carrying a gentle wisdom. She stood there, observing a young boy with dishevelled black hair and captivating cerulean eyes, his gaze filled with longing as he stared intently at the falling rain.

        "The rain..."

        "It's sad"

        "Rain Rain Go Away Come Again Another Day"

        I don't want a review but more of chapter comments or paragraph comments if u feel like my book is too long or boring u can start around chapter 10 where most of the action happens or was it chapter 9? its better if u read the whole thing

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