Please review this draft for me
OUROBOROS CHRONICLES

PROLOGUE

Isn't it sad? They all wish to attain status, power, wealth, or something grand that will make them leave an impression, all for what to become an antique that the wind will crumble and oust! They desire to break the chains that limit them. It humors me so since a being who views them below me because of such ideals is bound by this same ideology. It makes me admire their tenacity. This may be the reason it loves its creation. However, this is all ending since "Day Of Ragnarök" is upon all these worlds. It saddens me that this endless world will end. It is time for me to escape the inevitable since the wheels of fate have spun once again. Let the show begin says the timeless figure as he observes.

Children, I'm back! Shouts an individual shrouded in a tattered black cloak close to the ground yet children stormed out of their homes which just led parents to smile, it made them remember like it was just yesterday when they suspected this person no one had seen his face yet he was called The Great Storyteller and The Wiseman since they came to learn that each time he came his words brought great wisdom to the people and even soothe the rowdiest of children. Finally, when the children sat around him, he said with a bittersweet smile, saying this is the final story and lesson. As he said what he had to say, he began. During the genesis, they referred it to as The Origin with every breath the world we know came to be. The world was never-ending as it seemed to encompass every branch of space, this world held two moons of great magnitude one was crimson red while the other was azure blue which represented the inception and horizon of all aspects respectively, and every single particle contained unusual properties labeled magic. In these distinct lands lifeforms of many kinds dwelled such as elves who resided in the land of Midgard, the dwarves who lived in Midea, dragons of different orders whose outcry could shudder the world, and humans whose potential was the greatest yet untapped among others races. He also created beasts of divergence and restrained them in purgatory to preserve balance. Subsequently, everything he envisioned came to be, and dimensions of unique laws appeared and were locked behind what was called The Tower of Babel even some named it Yggdrasil and whoever opened the gates would gain the power of The Origin. He then created guides who could peek through destiny and distort fate, however, after their creation, they vanished and only will appear in the cataclysm. He engulfed their psyches with every piece of information they needed. When he was done with his duty, he departed, and soon after their mentality became corrupted, seeking to each own the power for their race, since the first requirement was for one to sit on the throne to reach the Apotheosis. They couldn't settle this over an agreement which shortly led their anxiety toward each other to twist to greed, eventually leading to The First War remembered as The Reckoning.

Ever since, eons after eons, millennia, after millennia they spilled ample blood for the pigment of the evergreen pasture and dirt turn to resemble the color of roses and the soil denounced to bear fruits, the motive for these countless sacrifices had been forgotten in time and had become ludicrous slaughter in the world's sight they never forgot the endeavors of their ancestors to get The Throne Of Avalon. From distant lands beyond the stars, a boy saw an error in the world and sought to correct it hence, he descended. As he ventured the great beyond pursuing answers to concerns beyond once understanding, he made comrades who stood by his side. Records state that he finally settled on the throne and as he sat, the event was announced to the whole of The Allscape the pastures had returned to their green lustrous color and the soil had been lifted off its curse even the murky skies were blown away and blue beautiful skies never seen before overthrown it like a cruel ruler banished to a forgotten land. Once these changes occurred to the Allscape thirteen keys required to open The Gate surfaced, he gave the keys to his thirteen most trusted comrades to ensure the safety of his to-be kingdom named Adonis. Under his decree, his kingdom progressed, which sent great satisfaction to the people of his kingdom and rulers beyond his kingdom. At last, peace doesn't last as it does in fairytales, and history is bound to repeat itself. On the advent of a heavenly treasure that would have brought a new epoch, the First king was assassinated, the thirteen knights disappeared, and they lost the heavenly treasure in the sands of time. These occurrences were all compiled together as The Great Fall. They gave the orchestrator the title Belial Of the Fallen. After the king fell, no corpse was found. Yet another war erupted, but it was not to the extent of the first war because of the effort of courageous individuals who were inspired by this great king, hence peace prevailed. As new kings arose, technology developed once again, yet it could not amount to that of Adonis

Millenia has passed since then...

In the year 5000, the month of February, the clouds turned red like that of the Chrysanthemum. The air was stuffy as there was an eerie silence, and the stench of death lingered around Corinth. On this day in a home of an honest household a boy saw his parent killed in cold blood the killer stared right at him and introduced himself as Belial, he told him this resulted from his weakness the boy wanted to move with sheer grief and anger yet fear overdid all that action hence remained rooted where he stood; he prayed for the justice his parent preached would save them since they were always faithful advocates, yet it seemed the world had twisted itself to mock him. When Belial saw the swirl of emotions within his eyes, it humored him, yet he had a twitch of sadness. He immediately left after telling him that this emotion should shape him and, in any event, that he forgot he would be there to remind him of the pain he was feeling. Soon after tears trickled down the boy as he descended the basement as he recalled a hidden compartment down in the secured cellar he went there immediately as his retina was examined and another protocol was conducted before a briefcase along with a catalog of documents his parent amassed for him. He swore to become the justice that this world needed and to hunt that thing down.

That twilight in the main district of Xerxes; a ripple in time was felt and one of the world leaders felt that pandora's box was loosened and the era of serenity had come to a standstill. The boy would become known as Alexander Woods of the Grim Night.

    Hi, I’m a new author and I’m looking for some constructive feedback on my novel. It’s called “Mystery in the Whispering Grove” and it’s a fantasy novel with a hint of adventure, action, mystery, and romance.
    It’s about Aria and Theo, two chosen Keepers who have to master the elemental powers of Earth, Air, Water, and Fire to protect the ancient Whispering Grove from a dark threat. Along the way, they discover the secrets of light and shadow, truth and illusion, and their own destiny.
    If you enjoy stories with magic, mystery, and some adventure, you’ll love this novel. And if you don’t, I’d still value your opinion on how I can improve my writing style and craft a better story.
    You can read my novel here:
    https://www.webnovel.com/book/mystery-of-the-whispering-grove_27706412300716305

    Please read it and let me know what you think.
    Thank you for your time and support. I look forward to hearing from you soon. 😊

      This is my first novel.

      synopsis:

      "The first memory that overwhelmed my mind as I woke up in this unfamiliar form was the horrifying image of my own father decapitating me,” reminisced Garrick Stormwind, the Archduke of Astrea. Brutally murdered by his own family, he inexplicably finds himself imprisoned in an unknown body, shackled within the confines of a dungeon, consumed by an intense desire for revenge. Join him on his unwavering journey for justice and understanding as we delve into the captivating story of The Revived Archduke's Revenge.

      Thank you for your time and support.

      https://www.webnovel.com/book/the-revived-archduke's-revenge_27763328308994605

        Hi, I'm open to review swaps, but I need some honest feedback, preferably in paragraph or chapter comments. I know that my novel is lacking, but I can't pinpoint what the problem is (I'm sure it has a lot of issues, but bear with me). If anyone has the time, please help me. Thank you.🙏🙏😁

        You can read my novel here:
        https://www.webnovel.com/book/mystery-of-the-whispering-grove_27706412300716305

        Please read it and let me know what you think.
        Thank you for your time and support. I look forward to hearing from you soon. 😊

          watcher567 I already read the 3 first chapters and I must say that it was very good and captivating. I added into my library, so I can tune with your updates. Also thank you for the review and your feedback. I'll do my best to fix the issues you mentioned.

              Web Novel Novel Ask