Chryiss Your society may promote gender-equality, but as long as 'maleness' is the norm for 'good' then you're stuck with a problem.
I'm old enough to have seen this dilemma more accentuated. Basically early feminism called for everyone's right to be a man (or at least be seen as one).
It's a little more difficult today (in so called equal societies). Now everyone who identifies as a female has the right to be female -- in a male way...
In the end this very thread illustrates the problem. Is it 'bad' to be 'lame'? Is it 'good' to be 'badass'? I wouldn't know. I belong to the 50% of the population who identifies as (and is labelled) 'male'.
That said I'm glad that basically all posters identified 'wet dream doormat' as predominantly 'bad'.