Ezckapel I loved the plot and the concept of the story , your imagination is awesome but some minor mistakes will spoil the fun like some grammatical mistakes , conjunctions and if you try to explore some new words it'll be awesome please don't think I'm being harsh I just want to give a honest review so people can improve at first same thing happened to me and then when some people pointed my mistakes out I started to see errors in mine
Your story is awesome , and it has potential
Well done and keep growing