PeachyPearl I can't say much about it since I don't know what it's supposed to be about.

It might be nice to add more focus on the main character in her times of sorrow though. I barely saw much about it. One second she was sad, next she was fine. I know you described how her behavior changed from the observations of others but that's barely covering the surface of what she's going through. Adding more descriptive narratives may also help since these people can't read her mind. Like ummm... when a person's sad... does he/she stare off into space? Does he/she doodle scribbles on a notebook? When spoken to, does he/she answer in three words or less? Is his/her voice softer?

Hope this helps! If you don't feel like it anymore, it's okay to drop a story. If you think it only needs a bit of tinkering then, work on that. Since the story isn't solid yet, try to write an outline so you can assess if you want to keep it or not.

      PeachyPearl ah... I just remembered she's supposed to be someone who can conceal her emotions. Then, it might work better if we get more of what's going through her mind then, compare it to what the people observe

          CailinMatthews thanks for your thoughts. I can be more clear about a reader's aspects now. And as for why I haven't yet described what's going on in her mind is because it's packaged for the later chapters. Thanks again

              When a person is sad he eats cake like so much cake and he reads sweet tender romance novels and cries lmao

                Luna1777 so very helpful. Thank you very much, i am going back to the drawing board and will put in more effort coz of your review. Thanks a lot

                  CailinMatthews thank you so much for your review. You should be a critque, you are good at it. Thank you again and i am definitely keeping ur book in my collection.

                      Can i swap too?

                      Novel name: The Ruined World (TRW)

                      Synopsis: In a summer morning in the year 2020, was when it all started, the terror, later known as "The Darkness", few believed that this really would happen, for many were conspiracy theory, but when it really came, it took everyone from the most fanatical to the most discredited, but no matter how much people prepared, it wasn't enough for the terror that was to come.

                      Link: https://m.webnovel.com/book/12997136805296405

                      fantasy_land sorry couldn't read your novel in the past few days but today when I did, I was just too happy for you made me reminisce that sweet bickering couple from IPKKND, Arnav Singh Raizada and Khushi Kumari Gupta. I love them and so did your awesome novel so far.

                      I may post a review once I finish half of the available chapters at least. Love you loads. Keep it up

                          PeachyPearl I loved Arnav's character soo much that I took his name in my own novel 😂😂

                          Sure take your time. I have almost finished reading yours. May post a review anytime today!

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