Hey there,
I’m currently writing on a more thriller dark story that isn’t supposed to be horror at all but I just want one scene to go very much in a horror direction.
Any tips how to really make your readers shiver?
How do I write a horror scene?
NDelle. Write a true to life scene. Billy Bob comes home and expects Sharon Jean to have dinner on the table. She don't so he knocks her out with a frying pan and sets the trailer on fire.
NDelle Suspense. It's a key to make readers want to keep reading and feeling a bit scared. Also add in some scary descriptions (can't find a better way to word it (._.)) to make the reader feel like they're immersed into your books world. Short sentences also help add a bit of suspense as it makes the reader read faster.
Ex.
"That night Bob had already prepared himself for tomorrow. Clothes folded, papers organized, and the box still sealed." Dave began to rock himself slightly.
"What box?" The policeman's pen was furiously writing down Dave's statements.
"I-I don't know! But that night Bob called me. Tic tik, tic tik... Over and over again. On the phone he kept repeating that. Tic tik, tic tik..." Dave had his hands in his hair now.
"Did he say anything else?" Dave paused his rocking.
"Not 'he', 'it'. 'It' killed Bob I'm sure! Now 'it' is coming for me..." Dave jumped to his feet, his arms reaching behind him. "It's on me ! It's on me! H-help! Help!"
"Sir, please calm down. Sir-!?" Dave stopped squirming. Above the policeman 'it' was there. Black hair that moved like a monster draped in front of it. Pale blue hands reached out of the mass. Dave stood frozen. Move! Move! Move! He willed himself to look away, to run but, the monster held him there.
"A-Ahh!" Dave suddenly started to open his mouth. At first it looked normal but then his lips began to tear apart, spreading his mouth further.
"Sir?!" The policeman tried to stop Dave but the moment he touched Dave he could see 'it' too. Dave was wrapped in long snake like hair, his mouth being pried open by multiple pale hands. The monster turned around and grinned. It's smile going from one side to the other.
"Tic tik, tic tik..."
And that's my example. I don't write thriller often but I hope you get the idea. Not the best at describing what I mean but it's also left to you to interpret as well.
Hopes this helps!
- Edited
NDelle Not sure if you’ve ever read Murder the Dream Guy, but that had a lot of suspenseful moments in the book where I thought MC was in grave danger. It was done very subtly too, not overtop or obvious, but it was hair-raising.
I’m not sure which type of thriller you’re going for, whwther dramatic or spooky. But if the latter, the little details that are suddenly/strangely off from the usual makes one shiver/be on edge—much like a jumpscare. For example, the classic flickering light and shadows with a cold breeze and silent air where your footsteps are amplified. Another would be realizing that your tiny window above the door makes anyone on the upper floor be able to see in your home (Murder the Dream Guy). Also, another scene I liked was realizing there’s minced human inside a wall after a dog kept barking at it but finding nothing obvious in the wall when tearing it down. Little things added up can create nice suspense, essentially making the mundane dangerous.