- Edited
AuriLin
Hello darling.
What do I think? Well, first of all, I read 7 chapters, so let's say you got my attention. My reading span is no more than 2 chapters until I get annoyed by something I find stupid.
But, honestly, your story start is too bland. The most interesting part is not the daily silent suffering of your 'schizophrenic' MC, but the interlude.
So, I'd recommend jumping to the interesting turning point part. Don't take 5 chapters telling how was her school life, domestic life, and medical life. There are several other ways to show how Hannah was bullied and isolated while you jump to the thrilling part.
And, there are a lot of stories were 'special people' is bullied and misunderstood. So don't drag on it, it's a waste of time. I'd find it very amusing and interesting if it was quite the contrary: the schizophrenic girl is well adapted and super popular, in spite of her episodes.
And... even psychopaths have friends. She's unreal because she doesn't have a single friend.
Good luck with your editing. As you asked an honest opinion, here you have it.
Of course, it's your story and you don't need to take my opinion into account.