So I write a novel and have a dilemma what kind of style I should chose. This apply mainly to manner of describing the world and explaining it to the audience. The first one is direct explanation given by the narrator to the reader as in this case

"And so they were quarreling all the way back to their city which took them a full day. It is worth to mention that the first way when they were delivering "The prey" had taken them almost a three days. The reason of that was quite obvious the girls were not eager to became a dinner. In result the men(by some people known also as watchdogs) used to disciplined their captives really harsh so when they finally were presented to the dragon they would not do anything what the beast could see as disrespect. As reader can noticed The Watchdogs were not cruel by their nature. They were really touched by the fate of the young women yet still they had no courage to oppose. This only show us how fierce and malicious Voland was that even man of kind-heart turn into emotionless servant."

The second one is using dialog as a narrative device as in this case

"-Hehe I see that you are quite curious person aren't you? That is true that steel is better in combat however bronze is more reactive to Power of The World. Effects of incantations hold on longer on bronze than on any other metal. This is also the reason why the previous age is called The Age of Heros. Back then bronze was the mani material used to make weapon and armors so they rely more on Power of The World than we do today."

The first approach seems to be more creative but some people may find it weird and abandon the novel.
The second approach seems to to be safer but it is less probable that it would attract someone via originality.
The best choice seems to be used both of them depending on what is more suited to the situation but then again people may found it as inconsistency of the author's style. It is hard to judge it myself so I would appreciate your opinion.

    Res_Publica
    I'd be wary of introducing a narrator type presence in your novel. For me personally, I like to get sucked into the story and experience it more first hand. Drawing my own conclusions to the events that take place on the page. With a narrator, you have someone with an opinion. They are telling the story through their own eyes, the way they percieved it.

    This is why stories with narrators often draw on the "Unreliable narrator" type, where it turns out the narrator has been lying or embellishing the whole time.

    To me, it also just provides a certain sense of disconnect, like I'm not reading a story any longer. Slightly hard to explain.

    However, I'm not even sure if that is what you are talking about. You seem to be talking more about the "neutral" narrator type that is in all third person stories. In that case, what do you mean by originality? There's nothing in your text example that indicates anything non-standard at least from my perspective.

    The only weird thing I see is you put "As reader can noticed" which is just weird overall. Are you trying to convey breaking the 4th wall? I'm not quite sure what you're getting at honestly. Breaking the 4th wall however is not very original either, and in my opinion, a horrible thing. Instead I'd just word it "As one could notice", or something like "As could be noticed".

    You'd wanna be careful with super long dialogues too, because at that point it becomes hard to make the speech natural.

    Anyway, I'm really confused on what you're really trying to say. I think you should just stick to standard third person limited pov.

      Res_Publica WALL of TEXT! Don't do that.

      That is this Rabbink's biggest mistake as newbie author. Most of readers surrendered on First 10 chapters. You can check this Rabbink earlier chapters compared to later chapters.

      The second one is worse. You make a character talk to readers. I can't see the context, but if it is not in proper context, it would be strange.

      If you want to see good style. Check TKA of FMHM.

      In original, you should check Reborn. If you want to make a beautifully explained story check The Red Bride.

          ImBloo Lol! You should check Top Original Ranking to see the 'style' that Webnovel readers wants. I think Lyner Teacher (@lynerparel) should be able to teach you more about style. His Adopted Soldier, flowed very nice. While he is the top authors that is active in this forum.

          (PS: This Rabbink is only on its first 400k words. Still need time to learn. My fourth novels garner more praise than my first novel.)

          I think he would get a contract soon for the Adopted Soldiers, it suits Webnovel readers so much. Fun, Lightweight, but had Shonen aura. Webnovel would be crazy to miss this novel. It had potential for 'merchandising', I can imagine a 'figurine' series.

          @lynerparel You should check the term carefully when you got it. You have another contracted novel outside. However, Wiz could do it. So I believe it won't be a big deal.

              Deborahgold Actually I have recently received a comment that my story is not organized... But that's his opinion, the way I write my story is I put a character, give him a set personality then just write whatever I feel that kind of person will do in said situation.

                  I dunno. I do what makes me happy. You gotta ask yourself if you are writing for your readers or yourself. I personally write for myself. I started writing only to make myself a better writer (and because I was absolutely sickened by My Cold and Elegant CEO Wife (seriously triggered me)).

                  With that said, I personally write because I want to. I will listen to my readers and if I like an idea, I'll let it give me a story chapter or so. But at the end of the day, you are your biggest fan. You have to like what you are writing. So choose whichever you find to fit your story the best! You will hate your first few chapters. You will cringe at them later. You will hopefully edit them. And you will hopefully finish your story and become a better writer!

                    BabyTanuki My Cold and Elegant CEO Wife

                    Welp really? I want to check that novel. Gwahahaha. It is on my bookmark list of What's next.

                        Thanks everyone for opinions and suggestions 👍

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