Del_Maibam hi, finished yours. Sorry if being blunt but maybe you should do an edit with grammar and typos in mind. Also, try to sort out the (2 days ago, 3 days later things). It felt disjointed. Again, sorry if I'm being too blunt. It's a good story but I think it could be much better with an edit. Feel free to disagree.

    Del_Maibam wanna swap with me? It's okay if you give a negative review but don't give low marks. My review is getting lower to lower day by day. I will do the same after getting my review 😉

      Davidwatts6957 done. But the dialogues were unbelievable at best. They don't work that way and you should focus on tense and grammar as well. Hope I'm not being too harsh

        Noel_Ceniza_1290 finished with yours. It was pretty good. Maybe cut out some redundant words like (even though), but it's up to you, and feel free to disagree. Overall, I'd say this was a good read

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