KayLillyt_1 Finished, all I gotta say is great job. You seem to have mastered the art of written dialogue between multiple characters, and it was impressive.

      kuhaku_sora the biggest thing that I'd say is you probably don't need a prologue since you immediately jump past everything toward characters who don't seem to know they're in VR or that they're NPC's in a VR game. There are some wording issues and typos. But, the start is pretty good just some that world-building could be integrated into the story a bit better.

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