7 months later

CCmei Alright! I've stocked up on tissue paper since we don't have any toilet paper, so I'm ready for my glass heart to be broken!!

My story is called World's First Demon Lord! Here's the link:

https://www.webnovel.com/book/16238588506402605/World's-First-Demon-Lord

And the synopsis:
"This world is truly...boring."

The Mage King, overthrown and killed by his own people, escaped via one last spell. Reincarnated in the body of a weak baby, he sets off to conquer the world once more.

Except somehow, he has been reincarnated into a completely different world. A world with no mages...aside from him.

What is the point in ruling such a boring world? He might as well reincarnate again. Until the TV catches his eye, and he sees a certain animation from a far east Asian country...

Maybe...maybe I can do something here. Maybe in this world without mages, a mage is what is needed to spice things up a little. Maybe this boring world needs...a Demon Lord to rule it from the shadows.

If this world isn't interesting enough, then I'll force it to change with my own hands!

"A Demon Lord needs henchmen, so I will create my own!"

"I also Heroes to fight against, so let's make those as well!"

"Hmmmm...I like System novels, let's give a Hero a Gamer system!"

"I also like superheroes and romances, let's create some superheroes and make them fall in love!"

"What's this? A thriller? Hmmm...maybe I can make something like this too..."

Feel free to stop by any time!

      CCmei Seeing that it's a productive thread, I won't lock it for now. :) Tell me if you need it locked anytime soon, though.

          So, posting link here is allowed or not ?

          Forum says review outside monthly review thread is prohibited, so I am just wondering is it okay to post my novel links here ?

            NoWoRRyMaN
            Those are for review swaps I believe. Since this is a pretty one way thing with just me giving out reviews, as long you're not actively/shamelessly promoting your novel in the thread then it's fine. A link with a request is fine.

            (Warning though- I will review seriously and honestly. You can search up to the other reviews I already did in done replies for a sample if you wish.)

              yaoyueyi

              bows to the great Yuebot

              Many thanks. I am not worthy but shall beseech you when the time comes before my puny human body drowns.

                CCmei
                It was really help, like a lot.❤ I'll follow the points and I'm glad someone did a detail review, pointing out many things. (T _T) I can see how much wotk it needs, haha. After staying on WN around 8 months now I can find the odd things and lackings.😃 Thank you very much.

                    ElianaG If you sincerely wish for an honest review that you will use, please provide a link to your novel.

                    Include any notes or warnings if you feel it is relevant.

                        Aysel_Inara Editing is hard, perhaps it was the repost too soon. I'm just glad you didn't give up.

                        The first (few) drafts of anything is flawed, maybe even shitty. I know my own novels could use a drastic 5 rounds of editing on those first few chapters myself. It even makes me cringe to look at some of them.

                        But that's a good things bc iteams you have grown as a writer. That you have improved.

                        Sorry for the 8 months late review (lol but I guess that makes it for more stuff for me to review?).

                        More things I'd like to add on: Make it enjoyable. To yourself or the readers, make it something you feel you want to read. You can use intrigue, works building or the characters- whatever you like.
                        It may be getting to the "main couple" in the later parts of ch 60-70 but that can't hold it. Many times throughout this novel I was not excited or even interested in starting the next chapter. I saw another reader respond "cliff!" to a few of your chapter endings but that didn't feel like cliffs to me. Did not keep that intrigue.

                        Make me( any reader) feel something, make me want to be interested/invested.

                        Note two not included in review: There's repeated parts from one chapter to another. Maybe you did it on purpose to storytelling sake. But sometimes I feels like a daytime TV show recap
                        "Last time on ..." And you just repeat lines.

                            CCmei

                            Ah! I see.🤔 I got it, well...8 months later review was a good thing at least you find a lot of chapters to point out the major flaws. The less the chapters are, the less criticism (to improve).

                                CCmei

                                Ah! I see.🤔 I got it, well...8 months later review was a good thing at least you find a lot of chapters to point out the major flaws. The less the chapters are, the less criticism (to improve).

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