Ehh... I wish somebody would read a few chaps of my novel and write some constructive criticism, not the sh*t that can be written after reading the synopsis, or repeating what people have already written.
Comments like they piss me off:
"you do not publish regularly" - how am I supposed to publish when my story was contracted, and a dozen or so chapters came out of the machine at the same time?
and other similar...
If somebody offers a review at least should read a few chaps. How you can write about the plot, flow, characters, of the background, etc. if you don't read a few chaps.
Detailed Review Request Thread!!
hansora
I accept all genres. I have a hard time with boys' love tho. It's really not my thing.
Jo_J
Hahaha, frustrated I see. I'll take a look at your book. I remembered reading up to chap 3 already. The Bet right? I'll see what I can find. Don't expect a mind-blowing revelation tho. It'll also take some time. Between one to three days. Maybe less if I'm feeling motivated.
Here you go, I'm nervous!
As the Wind Blows Your Scent to Me
Slice-of-life, romance
Synopsis
"Meow~ Meow~"
The orange tabby cat sneaked out of the house, bringing back with it a little girl to resurrect the faint link between two people who had just crossed paths together once.
Three years ago, Kato Himari was forced to end her first love in order to cherish herself more. On the same night, she met him in a series of strange events.
Life went on and the uncanny events were put at the back of her mind.
After nursing her heartbreak for three years, a funny companionship of a cat and a little dumpling led her to meet a warm and tender man.
Three years ago, Hayashi Kazuya was compelled to assume a crucial role after tragic events kept on befalling his loved ones. In the process, he had to redefine what was important to him.
There were things he had to let go of.
There were things he had to hold on to.
As he was still hanging on a thread, he met her who reminded him of smiling daffodils to the sun.
Would their encounter give them second chances of gaining more hopes in the face of the future?
"Uncle, when would you give me an auntie?"
"Uncle, why don't you marry Teacher Kato home?"
"Teacher Kato, do you find my uncle handsome?"
Both of them exchanged glances before they hurriedly looked away with the tips of their ears reddened. The little girl grinned and gave thumbs up to the orange tabby cat next to her before she looked at her back.
"Big Brother, look! I've found us an auntie!"
"Meow~ Meow~"
The orange tabby cat happily agreed to the little girl's words.
- Edited
I am. If somebody asks me about the honest review (some help) I will spend my time reading and tell what people are doing wrong. I will send them links about proper construction, dialogues, etc...
I have another contracted (Anemones)... The novel is finished, just don't have the time to add all the chaps.
I don't expect much, just a few specific comments... but that's what people write it... eh...
Anemones
slice of life, realistic story
(Not really a synopsis, but a piece of review written by a professional literary critic...)
"A story about the editorial world of a men's magazine...
A love story with elements of betrayal or a story of betrayal with elements of love. All this in the scenery of the high society we long for; additionally packed with culinary and automotive trips.
Anemones slightly feminizes reality and it is a thing that should attract many readers - men and women equally.
It's about men! But written in the author's optics, so all readers will find their fascinations fulfilled.”
hansora
Alright. Since, technically, you were the first to ask I'll put your work on top of my to-do list.
Hum. Currently 56 chaps. Honestly, I probably won't read that far. But I'll at the very least read ten chaps.
Jo_J
Alright, could you give post your request as per the method, please? Just for the protocol's sake.
I'll place at #2 on my to-do list. Expect a delay of 2 or 4 days.
Hi! Here's mine; please review it.
I can take any hard criticism if it improves my novel. Thank you!
Title: Didn’t I say make me famous in my next life? (Euphonic)
Genre: Isekai, Fantasy, Comedy, Omegaverse, Music
Synopsis:
Luca Yashima, an introverted 18-year-old teenage boy who dreamt of being an “IDOL” when he was a child despite his social condition. Following his ticket flying through the air, a speeding truck suddenly appears around the corner, meeting his demise. With the help of a lesser god who lost a bet from Apollo, he was offered to be reincarnated to a parallel world. A world where music is banned, a world full of chaos and misery. To avoid things going the same way as his past life, he vowed that he will do everything to live his new life, enjoy music & become an idol that he always dreamt of in exchange for a wish—a wish that will help him, a wish that will bring rhythm to that world. Only to found himself stuck on a cycle of failures and misfortunes after his revival. On his quest, he meets a carefree commoner who puts a smile on everyone he encounters, a notorious general who has a soft spot for weak and feeble, and a crowned solemn indecisive prince who mourns and hates music. This, however, ends up having unexpected consequences and leap to his dream to become famous.
LINK: https://m.webnovel.com/book/didn't-i-say-make-me-famous-on-my-next-life_20240731306570505
Yoan_Roturier it's okay, it's already enough for me. Thanks!
If anyone needs an honest review too. I can spend some of my time too and do a few.
Jo_J Review mine please.
- Edited
Here's a little synopsis analysis to start.
Your synopsis has two parts.
———————
THIS ONE:
*Three years ago, Kato Himari was forced to end her first love in order to cherish herself more. On the same night, she met him in a series of strange events.
Life went on and the uncanny events were put at the back of her mind.
After nursing her heartbreak for three years, a funny companionship of a cat and a little dumpling led her to meet a warm and tender man.
Three years ago, Hayashi Kazuya was compelled to assume a crucial role after tragic events kept on befalling his loved ones. In the process, he had to redefine what was important to him.
There were things he had to let go of.
There were things he had to hold on to.
As he was still hanging on a thread, he met her who reminded him of smiling daffodils to the sun.
Would their encounter give them second chances of gaining more hopes in the face of the future?*
————————
And THIS ONE:
*"Meow~ Meow~"
The orange tabby cat sneaked out of the house, bringing back with it a little girl to resurrect the faint link between two people who had just crossed paths together once.*
*"Uncle, when would you give me an auntie?"
"Uncle, why don't you marry Teacher Kato home?"
"Teacher Kato, do you find my uncle handsome?"
Both of them exchanged glances before they hurriedly looked away with the tips of their ears reddened. The little girl grinned and gave thumbs up to the orange tabby cat next to her before she looked at her back.
"Big Brother, look! I've found us an auntie!"
"Meow~ Meow~"
The orange tabby cat happily agreed to the little girl's words.*
————————————
It isn't necessarily a bad thing. However, the way it is structured is confusing. I found myself frowning when reading it. I had to read back the first sentence a couple of times before understanding that part one talked about the characters backgrounds and part two is some kind of short story that announces the tone/color of your book.
In my opinion, either you keep one part or you fuse both, or find a way to make it flow. Keep in mind that a synopsis on Webnovel (the right word is actually "blurb"), needs to:
- Introduce your main character(s)
- Announce the tone and genre (don't write "this is a romance/slice of life book!" please)
- Be short, NOT TOO short mind you.
- Explain the main-conflict
You already got those tho. So kudos to you. Just make it flow better.
The "three years ago" part of the synopsis wasn't right to me, because it's repeated twice. It feels like we're going backward, but we're actually reading forward. Weird....
The cat seems important and cute. But... I kept wondering what that thing was doing here. And who were those people talking? We can guess who they are, but with no actual settings to relate to it's kinda hard on the reading part. However, it's cute.
So to put it in a nutshell, your synopsis already has the main elements for a good one. But you need to correct the flows, meaning, improving the readability and avoid confusion.
If I wasn't clear enough, because I wasn't, do ask me to clarify the points you didn't understand.
Hope it helps.
- Edited
Broken Tower Saga: The First Swordsman
silent_walker
GENRE: FANTASY
Link:
https://www.webnovel.com/book/broken-tower-saga-the-first-swordsman_19844340505430905
Synopsis
The Maha Tower or The Broken Tower of Omega, some call it. It is a place of Dream, a place of Passion and a place of Chaos. Wealth, Glory, Fortune, Strength. Everything could be found here as they say.
Wrik spent years to find this tower, ignoring his studies, University. But to no avail. Until a day when a letter came to his door with a pair of tickets to the tower.
Little did he know that the place he was leaving for is full of threats and risks. He had to face off several known and unknown Enemies – Newfound or Ancient.
Join in the adventure of Wrik Everknight, who with his few new and old friends climb the tower, learn the ancient power of Mahasayer and uncover the mysteries of the destruction of Maha.
I edited it a bit after reading it... Still like to add something.
Tags10 tags
MYSTERY1# GAMELEMENTS1# SCIFI1# FANTASY1# LITRPG# TOWER1# HEIST1# ELEMENTALPOWERS # ADVENTURE
You're doing a fine job by the way... I've seen your other post about promoting your novel... It makes easier for the moderator or reader or writer...
YOU CAN BE HARSH WITH YOUR REVIEW... I WON'T MIND...
THANK YOU IN ADVANCE.
AND LAST IF ANYONE ELSE WANT ANY HONEST REVIEW COULD REPLY TO THIS COMMENT... I'll try as soon as I can to critique it.
I re-edited the post above.
Thank you.
Yashima099
Note that I only do that when I feel like it. It's totally random.
Synopsis analysis:
Synopsis:
Luca Yashima is an introverted 18-year-old teenage boy who dreamt of being an “IDOL” when he was a child despite his social condition. When I read this, I feel like the sentence isn't finished. There is something missing, or you simply didn't write well enough. You can correct it by simply adding the word I added.
Following his ticket flying through the air, a speeding truck suddenly appears around the corner, meeting his demise. With the help of a lesser god who lost a bet from Apollo, he was offered to be reincarnated to a parallel world. A world where music is banned, a world full of chaos and misery.
To avoid things going the same way as his past life, he vowed that he will do everything to live his new life, enjoy music & become an idol that he always dreamt of in exchange for a wish—a wish that will help him, a wish that will bring rhythm to that world. Possible missing sentence here Only to found himself stuck on a cycle of failures and misfortunes after his revival.
On his quest, he meets a carefree commoner who puts a smile on everyone he encounters, now what I imagine is a guy drawing a smile on everyone he encounters. I think you wanted to write "who puts a smile on people's faces" or something like that. I'm too lazy to do the correct wording a notorious general who has a soft spot for weak and feeble, and a crowned solemn indecisive prince who mourns and hates music. This, however, ends up having unexpected consequences and leap possible wrong choice of word to his dream to become famous.
Be careful about your synopsis's structure. It looks like a block of foie gras when it should look like a hamburger (meaning composed of different parts.) Separating it into different parts enhances readability.
It does have every element necessary for a good blurb tho. There are probably more things to say about it, but I'll stop here.
- Edited
silent_walker
Thanks! Just doing it to help a bit Grand Void Daoist and the fun of it. The moderator is kind of... alone waging war against powerful enemies: Angry Spammers. And Yue bot is... I don't know where she is, probably vacation. Some other guy Motivated Sloth does work wonders and stops Angry Spammers attacks often enough. But, they keep coming so... it's a never-ending war. I'm just standing on the sideline with popcorn and throwing some health potions here there to help a bit. Hahahaha.
My review to-do list is currently full. However, I'll remember your request and come to you when I'm done with the others. If by then somebody didn't already review yours that is.
Yoan_Roturier
No problem... I know how much effort it takes to critique honestly... Thanks.
Yoan_Roturier Ok thank you!
LINK: THE REVELATION OF MANKIND
TAG: FANTASY, HORROR, ADVENTURE, ACTION, MATURE, SYSTEM
SYNOPSIS:
With the revelation of the end of the world was prophesied. The myths, tales, as well as legends that our forefathers recited from epoch to epoch, have begun.
In the Medieval Ages on a vast stormy night. A withered elderly man composes a poem frantically, his eyes turning dry and cracked. With the lamps beside him flickering incessantly, along with his menacing shadow, mimicking his frenzied movements. Shortly, a bolt of lightning illuminated his side profile, exposing a glimpse of his smile.
Using his withered hand, in adding the final stroke. In the distant future, the world shall burn this poem into their minds, 'Kildare'
A voice speaks from the Earth below, reaching the sky above, begging God for mercy.
The angels tremble and the demons lament.
Four winds will rise and the rainbow falls, driving the demons back to Hell.
The four elements cry in unison:
"Mercy, Jesus, Son of Mary, as you are God and King of Heaven!"
Waking up to be faced with legions of enemies, Bryan Godfrey sat on top of a hill of corpses, drenched in blood, while peering over the bloodied horizon, muttering ruefully, "Will this ever end?"
................................................
Honestly, I'm quite nervous, but I've just done some editing, and I've only finished on the few chapters early on, if you have time, please tell me if what i did is plausible in the long run :) ty btw. Cheers!
Yoan_Roturier I am here, Yoan-san. Awaiting the review
