great_gamer
Hey god_of_pleasure. I left a review about positive feedback and personal feedback on your book page.
I'll write the constructive criticism here:
first sentence of your synopsis is a run-on sentence. Incorrect in terms of grammar. Not sure if you did it on purpose for other reasons. I think breaking it with period should be fine?
Also, try to keep the tenses the same?
"Her voice didn't escape Harry's ear, so he got into the business with newfound energy from a listening voice that could melt anyone's heart just by hearing.
Suddenly he remembers a system and a cheeked potion which can help him, though due to the unstable soul he can't use magic, it wouldn't stop from using a potion."
You got past and present all mixed up.
Overall, the book is great! The basic setting is very interesting.
Please give me a review when you have time.
https://www.webnovel.com/book/12519833905731105
Review Swap (Screw it, just be shameless)
Author_Shizu oh my, a theft has occured right before my very eyes
Dr_Zombie No worries man! If its not too much trouble, could you copy and paste the review onto this version of the novel: https://www.webnovel.com/book/12590226105022105
I've re-posted it so that i could join the latest authors competition :D
Hi guys! I'm new here in Webnovel
Here's the book that I wrote
(Shamelessly pastes link)
I hope to hear from you guys in the comments :)
https://www.webnovel.com/book/12516797905716005/His-Imprint
Author_Shizu um, what? o.o Was it me?
Acutelittletrap guess I have to rewrite it(
gusdefrog Its LexieM3
- Edited
SimmeringHours thanks!
I also checked out your novel. I think you shouldn't limit your novel to 300 chapters. You made a rough draft for a novel that was good, but you didn't consider development for an idea and your writing skills. It will get better with the more you write.
Novels and Web novels are essentially different. You should aim for at least one million words. It would be better if you could drag one situation into a few chapters.
You mixed everything in the first three chapters because of the competition. But you can split them into different parts. Like 1.Village (you can describe MC' situation) 2. Past (Maybe one of his aunts will tell them bedtime stories and describe the past. This is required because you mentioned deleting previous chapters.) 3. Attack(from giants) 4. Journey(they will leave for a safe place.) 5.Danger, preparation or bravery(MC will send others and prepare to fight with the giant.) 6. Fight.
Ignore the last paragraph if you are not comfortable writing like that, but my advice is you should consider it because most web novels are written like this.
Also, check out 'Book of authors'. That might give you a new perspective on web novels.
P.S. i can't wait for your next chapters.
I will write reviews for others as soon as I can.
Apophis9
There are a few things I like to point out.
1. Grammar: starting chapters has some problems, but it gets better with new chapters. Check out Grammarly add-on.
2.Word choice: there are many places where a better word can be used.
3.Rushed story: it feels like a sitting in a superfast train. Slow it down, describe it in detail.
4.Cliche: some of your plots are used many times in other novels. You need something unique to attract more readers.
fantasy_land good novel so far.
early few chapters are really short, you should consider re-writing them.
try to plan chapters in advance, so you can merge them if they are short.
also, emotions needs more description.
develop side characters, i still on't know her grandpa's or his father's name.
it should be sister rather than short sis before they met, can't be that casual before meeting.(sis-in-law or bro-in-low)
more quantity require because people will find mistakes or loop hole in writing, if it's short.(like,how his grandpa barged in her office, without prior notice from her secretary. you need to clear up things like that.)
UnjustlyUnderpaid You are everywhere. Aren't you?
great_gamer Thanks. I will try to work on the early chapters.
great_gamer thanks a lot :)
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Author_Shizu consider me an entity that should not disappear from Webnovel. If I am to go missing, then something terrible has happened.
I will be a fundamental part of the fan base, whether people like it or not.
UnjustlyUnderpaid Yeah and that you have a very boring life.
- Edited
fantasy_land Just saw your post now. And nah I don't like to force anyone into reviewing. My previous post was only a joke.
And I only reviewed your novel because I thought it was interesting and...............short.
Author_Shizu you know it
I'll throw in my own shameless promotion too.
https://www.webnovel.com/book/12030947306788805
Let's be shameless to the bone!
https://www.webnovel.com/book/12426836305431105/Legend-of-Aurum
Dear all!
I am jumping into this discussion and would love if you could review my book.
It's here: https://www.webnovel.com/book/12575721605965905
Just let me know who all are reviewing and writing a review for it, and I'll do the same for them!
Thanks in advance.